Pocahontas

Disney didn’t tell you
that when she first
slept with Captain Smith
she was 12 years old and
at that time
organized nude dancing
by her young friends
for the delectation of the colonists.
If this disturbs you deeply
you’re probably beyond help.
You should go to Orlando
and stand in line for three hours in the rain.
Take a snapshot of Goofy.

Oh, two other things: in colonial
Virginia the age of sexual consent
was 10. And, if you eat
of the fruit of Disney
you will die.

—Ed Ochester